The Canada goose - what an a**hole

Yet another airborne threat to avoid this Spring

15 April 2021

Call them what you will - Canada goose, Branta canadensis, but now they have a new name...

"I work on a farm with a guy from Mexico who doesn’t speak a lot of English.

A Canada goose made a nest by one of the paddock gates and hissed at him while he was putting the horses out.

He comes back to us after and says, “I do not like the cobra chicken.” "

It's nesting time for the cobra chickens and that means they're more anti-social than usual. Not content with crapping all over public parks and trails and generally being obstructive, now they're picking fights too.

The hissing cobra chicken - all the charm of an aggressive drunk

So how do you defend yourself against the Canada goose when it's in full-on "You. Me. Square goes. Right here. Now. Put your dukes up." mode?

Apparently one trick is to never let them think they successfully intimidated you the first time, even if you are casually walking away.

Geese have massive egos and get more aggressive once they think they can beat you.

Even carrying an array of metal sticks is no deterrent when they get their dander up.

Canada geese know muay thai, wing boxing, taekwondo and jiu-jitsu. Migrating geese returning from Russia have learnt Systema.

I learned from one of the natural resource biologists that spraying grape juice usually takes care of any goose problems.

Many recommend Grape Kool Aid. This has yet to be confirmed.

However the cobra chicken has no fear and even less sense. They do not care who or what they attack. (Videos at bottom of page.)

Cobra chicken attacks man armed with newspaper and briefcase

US Marine demonstrates futile attempt to ward off cobra chicken using Karate Kid defence

Cobra chicken assails silverback gorilla. Gorilla beats hasty retreat.

Cobra chicken attacks elephant. Elephant gets very unhappy.

They give the phrase "a wild goose chase" a whole new meaning - now there's a wild goose chasing you.

The Canadian government even has a page dedicated to dealing with Canada geese.

Here's what they say about people/goose conflicts-

There are a number of ways in which geese may cause damage or danger to people.
At airports, Canada Geese can be a significant safety threat to
aircraft, creating dangerous takeoff and landing conditions, and most
airports conduct active hazing programs to reduce this possibility.

Nesting Canada geese will actively defend their nest sites, and
aggressive pairs can sometimes cause injuries, especially to small
children or pets.

Large flocks of Canada Geese can denude grassy areas, including parks, pastures, golf courses, lawns, and other landscaped areas where the grass is kept short and where there are ponds, lakes, and other bodies of water nearby, necessitating expensive turf-management activities by landowners.

Excessive goose droppings in some areas where large numbers of people and geese co-exist, e.g.,at golf courses, parks, and beaches can be a concern.

Agricultural and natural resource damage, including depredation of grain crops, overgrazed pastures and degraded water quality, have increased as Canada Goose populations have grown.

No recipes though.

To those in the know (hunters, mostly), they are considered a great meal, referred to by some as the "roast beef of the skies."

That's if the cobra chickens don't kill you first.

Man vs Canada goose.

An unfair fight.